Sean Hector had always dreamed of being a father, especially to a girl, so when he welcomed his daughter, Zola Renee, into the world two years ago, it was the happiest day of his life.
The excited first-time father told Observer Online that becoming a father has been everything he expected it to be and more, confessing that he looks forward to doing everything with his daughter, no matter how tedious or boring it may be.
“It was everything I expected and more! I looked forward to all the late nights, diaper changes, playtime, reading to her – but that morning, when I saw my daughter looking like an angel in her crib for the first time, I knew becoming a father was going to be the best moment of my life so far,” Hector said.
Hector was committed to being the best dad he could be, even before his partner became pregnant. His preparation included making sure he was in the right shape to raise a child, doing his research, and above all, communicating with his partner to help them get through difficult times when they came along.
“I told myself that if I fail to plan, it’s the same as planning to fail. Instead of stuffing my head with all the information from the internet trying to learn from other people’s experiences, I talked about it with my partner every day. We shared our expectations, fears, challenges, discussed each other’s strengths and weaknesses. The more I did that, the more prepared I felt,” Hector revealed.
Hector, a manager at LH Multimedia, said he seemed perfectly prepared to take on the role of fatherhood but encountered a few surprises along the way.
He said he thought when he became a father he would always feel the urge to strive for something and work hard, but having Zola Renee come into his life has made him feel the need to slow down and make time for the things that matter, like spending time with his daughter.
“I always thought having a child would be the catalyst for starting a new era in my life — working harder, making tougher decisions, and being the hero my daughter needed 24/7. To my surprise, becoming a father taught me how to get back on track!”
“I’ve been used to working hard all my life. I’m always working because my job is very demanding and I have to be accountable for everything I achieve or don’t achieve. Now I make time for walks, dinner, play, family time, etc. My daughter also demands that time, so I’m learning as I go and just relaxing,” he said.
As Hector watches his daughter grow up, he marvels at how much she resembles him. He reveals that he seems to have inherited his love of music and dancing skills. He also seems to have inherited his love of reading, as evidenced by the fact that Zola Rene would hold books upside down while looking at the pictures even before she could walk.
For Hector, his relationship with his father played an important role in learning how to relate to his daughter. Growing up in a nuclear family, Hector said having his father close by gave him the opportunity to see how he would react when problems arose, and they were always dealt with in a positive way.
“My dad and I get along well. I grew up with both parents so my dad was always there. He wasn’t as involved as my mom was but he was there in every situation. What I learned from my dad is to look at everything positively, even the adverse situations. That has remained the same throughout my life and now that I’m a father. I am very patient and I try to put myself in baby Zola Renee’s shoes so I never get annoyed when she breaks something or wants to play when I’m busy. That’s something I learned from my dad,” Hector explained.
Hector said he’d always only wanted one child but could justify having another, attributing his change of heart to the joys of raising a daughter, the life lessons he learned and the support he’s received from his siblings.
When asked if he wanted a boy this time around, he replied: “I don’t think it would be much different if I became the father of a boy. Having a daughter hasn’t changed my outlook on parenting. But I always knew I would be the father of a girl, and I’m happy about that.”
